Because I'm only human, it's sometimes hard to be
The wise, all-knowing creature that my cat expects of me.
And so I pray for special help to somehow understand
The subtle implications of each proud meowed command
Oh, let me not forget that chairs were put on earth to shred
And what I like to call a lap is actually a bed
I know it's really lots to ask but please, oh please, take pity
And though I'm only human, make me worthy of my Kitty!!!